Last year, at some point on or around the first of January, I filled up the tub, grabbed my old fabric covered goth style diary that hosts a bunch of stuff I’ve written since 1998.  I’m not an avid journalist who writes every day or anything, but I’ve always tried to keep a diary of sorts, however sporadic my writing might be.

As I lounged in the deliciously fragranced bath water**, I was surrounded by this hideous puke pink and blue barf vintage tile and I thought 2012 was going to kick some serious ass.  I made a fairly long and categorized list of “Things to Do: 2012”.  I tend to prefer a New Year’s list of things that I want to accomplish over resolutions, since that seems more tangible to me.  I think that I’m likely to do at least some of the things on the list and then find myself looking back at the end of the year and saying–“hey I did that!”.  Vaguely recalling some lifestyle change I resolved to make but failed miserably at doesn’t appeal to me.  Especially ones that require a monthly pre-authorized debit from my bank account.  I’d rather just live my life, thanks, and try to be awesome in as many ways as possible.  Just as a general rule.

Leading up to the New Year this year, I had a hard time really getting pumped about what I was going to do in 2013.  I wasn’t feeling inspired in the slightest.  I had been working pretty hard for the months preceding the holidays, and really I just needed a vacation away from really having thoughts.  At the time I was disappointed that I wasn’t feeling the vacay vibe, but looking back now, it was exactly the type of holiday I needed. I didn’t accomplish much around the house, but I spent a fuck load of time with Marigold and Martin, and that did my heart some serious good.  I cooked a lot, and I even had the pleasure of spending some time watching some fancy birds hang in my backyard tree (a cardinal, a blue jay AND a red-headed finch).  I barely even left the house, and I certainly wasn’t overcome with positive energy about 2013.

I realized shortly after the hoopla of New Year’s was over (read:  drunken shenanigans with Rico the party animal and a cookathon to make my annual brunch a reality) that my path to inspiration and zeal was uphill, with bursts of being overcome with enthusiasm that waned and waxed again over the course of a few days.  It  took me until today to get to the proper top of the “kick some ass” incline, but I’m here now.  And it’s fucking awesome.  I felt better today than I have in at least six weeks–maybe even six months.  It’s truly fucking awesome.  I’m back to kicking down doors, and I’m gonna work hard to keep it that way.

As I slowly moved towards getting pumped for the transition that typically awaits us at the turn of the calendar, I started mentally prepping my “Things to Do: 2013” and finally, I pulled out the old goth diary to re-read the list I put together last year.  I hadn’t looked at it since the day it was written, which is typically a pretty good indicator that the success factor on most items is going to be limited, if I managed to accomplish anything on the list at all.

Good news everyone!  The first thing I read, the last thing on the list and the only thing under the heading Career, is a lone line that says:

–Find a job downtown.

Thank you very much, ladies and gentlemen, I hit a fucking home run right out of the park.  I feel like I basically nailed my 2012 “Things To Do” list, and even though this line item is preceded by a two page, four category laundry list of twenty-twelve goals, that were predominantly unchecked after reading through them, I don’t even care.  There’s obviously more to the job switch than geography but I won’t bore you with the details.  It totally worked out.  And that feels pretty fucking awesome. My motto for 2012 was “make it happen” and I sure fucking made it happen!

I got so much satisfaction out of accomplishing that one thing, that it was easy to put together a list for 2013.  It’s maybe not as extensive as 2012, but it’s a list of all the things I want to do, so I figure that’s about right.  I even put together a list for Things to Do:  This Week!.  And I’m happy to say that I’ve accomplished almost half of the things on that list so far, and I still have 2 days left!

Take that, To Do! list!

There ya have it.  Thanks, 2012, for letting me “Make it Happen”.  Welcome, 2013…not only am I going to live, I’m going to SHINE!

**(I have a ridiculous weakness for Lush bath products, as they give me super powers which allows me to pretty much accomplish anything in life, or at least they make me feel that way)

4 thoughts on “SHINE!


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